Notes from part 3 of Bringing Up Baby

Bringing Up Baby Week 3

Topic, crying and colic
This week portrayed scenes of an abusive and neglectful nature that were difficult to view. There is so much wrong with this series it is almost pointless highlighting specifics. The overwhelming message coming from the poor babies this week was one of dangerously heightened stress levels. Babies being force fed, babies vomiting, babies showing very red skin tone, back arching, and turning away when being held - avoidant behaviour. Babies close to collapse being roughly fed as part of a regime to be followed. Shocking scenes of babies becoming quiet... There are genuine child protection issues here.

The time-frame here is 2 - 6 weeks

Spock family, having 'their time' snuggled on sofa in the evening.
Dad: This is what we used to do (baby is 2 weeks old)
Mum: I feel physically sick when he cries - I don't know if you suffer from that.
...I gotta go.

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Mentors Claire Verity CV, Claire Scott CS (Continuum)

CV Babies cry for no reason at all
CS They have such an anticipation about being held.
CV It isn't about being held, there isn't a reason why they cry all the time, sometimes they just cry for absolutely no reason at all. Very clever little things - they know exactly what's going on.
CS (gasp) You think they're manipulative don't you?
CV They are - very much, very much they are, course they are.

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Voice over (VO) Colic isn't harmful. Doctors advise babies are not left to cry for more than 15 mins

This scene was very difficult to view

Truby King family with twins struggled with evening crying and had previously brought the twins down. CV suggests cutting the afternoon feed 'so it will feed better at 7.00 and sleep'. The feed is 1 1/2 oz.

Mum: It doesn't seem like that much Claire, does it?
CV It isn't is it? I know, it's hardly anything at all. Right, that's good.
Right little (name), you're in for a bit of a shock hunny bunny. Make the most of it.
- It's quite a shock to the baby's system to do this, but it's just a one-off, or maybe tomorrow as well just to get them back into this routine of sleeping at 7 o clock because they're very much out of it by the sound of it and I'm not sure what's gone wrong. Something else has gone wrong somewhere else down the line, and we need to take this drastic action to get them back in otherwise they're going to keep doing this for a long time.
- There. What d'you think to that young man?
Mum (distressed, baby mouthing) Oh look, he's looking for food. I don't want to see him hungry.
CV He's going to be hungry, but it's up to you if you want to stop it right now and feed another 2 oz and be up and down stairs all night.
Mum: OK
CV I know you can do it.

CV Rocking twins in buggy, to camera...
I think she thinks she's starving them and they're going to be really upset and they're going to hate her for it. I mean, they're only babies, they don't even know and at the end of the day, when it comes to bath time they'll be starving and that means they're going to take 4 oz which is a good night's sleep. You can't expect to be tied to a baby literally 24 hrs a day. You have to have time on your own, you need to have time out and that's between 7 and 11 when these babies are in bed.

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VO To make sure they sleep in the evening she wakes the babies from their afternoon nap one hour earlier.

What follows was a damming piece of broadcasting showing the abusive and brutal treatment of infants, which was almost impossible to watch.

Babies screaming in distress
Mum (distressed): I hate it when she's crying.
CV It is all about at the end of the day keeping them awake during this hour just to keep them going so they're absolutely shattered and really hungry.

The twins are so tired they can hardly feed - but they have stopped crying. They are being fed roughly to force them to take the milk, when they are exhausted.

CV Come on madam.
Give it 100 per cent with this routine. No grey areas, black and white, all or nothing.

Later, sat on settee, dad with a beer
CV This is what it's all about, you need to toughen up, really.
Mum: But it's so difficult Claire
CV No it isn't. Be firm at the end of the day you're the one that needs this time together.
Dad: I'll drink to that.
Mum appears defeated

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The breastfeeding in public discussion was very poor. Two of the mentors were shocked at the prospect and found it disgusting.

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CV Dad: Don't stick your tongue out at me. (See Social Baby book. This is early communication, and something to be celebrated. It is hugely empowering for dads if they know what is happening)

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CV's child minder mum (back to work after 6 weeks) feeding the baby quickly, twice. Baby sick.
CV It's all about how much you can get inside. It's like a car, the more you put in the further it goes. Just the same with a baby.

Baby wakes at 2.45am

VO After several traumatic nights (name)'s no longer waking. Are these the first parents to get an unbroken night? And just 6 weeks after giving birth (mum) is back at work as a childminder.